It is all worth it....

The other night I cried when I put Trenton to sleep. Trust me, I attribute part of it to hormones, but the other part is realizing just how much my son is growing up. He had fallen asleep in my lap and I did not want to put him down. I was loving holding him and watching him sleep. However, I try to get him to fall asleep in his crib, and since he was in my arms I knew I had to put him down. I walk upstairs and put him in his crib and just start crying. I see his precious little self in that big crib and realize just how much he has grown. He won't remember these days where Mommy's lap was the most amazing place or the times that he wanted to be held. These moments are so precious and so fleeting. Now, I know, Trenton is only 5 months, but really, these five months have flown by!

On Monday, during his day with Nameless she enjoyed those moments. I called to check on him and she said "he slept in my arms for about an hour" I said, "Mom, you can put him down and he may sleep longer" to which her response was, "How will he know he is sick?" Those moments are even more precious to her. She doesn't get to see him as much as I do. However, she is really good about letting him play on the floor and the bed, but those moments when he is in a cuddling mood, you have to eat them up. Those moments when he wants to be held are few and far between.

This morning, Trenton is still not himself. He is struggling with the pollen (i guess) and his poor little eyes are still glassy and red. He actually looks like he has been doing drugs or pulled an all nighter. So, I got to daycare early (even though I woke up late) and Trenton looked at me with those red eyes and grinned. I just had to hold him. We sat in the rocking chair as I discussed things with other Moms and talked to his teachers about how his breathing is starting to get more noticeable, so we are going to try and see a specialist as soon as I can get a referral to go, all the while Trenton and I are rocking. I look over and see him just sound asleep and drooling all over my shoulder. Those are the moments that make all the craziness, scheduling, stress, and arguments (with Wes) worthwhile. Those moments where we get to be together, just us, and he can finally relax and just give in to those tired eyes.