Are you there God, It's Me Sara

I know most of you have to remember Judy Blume's book Are You There God, It's Me Margaret. I remember that book from when I was in Middle School. That book helps adolescent girls in so many ways - I mean, that time of life is hard, awkward, demanding, confusing, the list could go on.

Well, I am 26 now and I have made it through all (ha! most) of the issues related to adolescence, but I am waiting on the next installment of Judy Blume's book. Is there a novel about making it through your first few years of marriage, your first baby, and dealing with the pressures of school, work, and the economy? Or maybe Mrs. Blume doesn't know how to best deal with the reality of life outside of middle school. I am not insulting her, but it is hard to write a book that is able to relate to many different personalities during the 'transitional' time in your life.

I am not saying this as a woe is me, I deserve so much more type of blog - it is more of a when did life become so real blog. See, this all started when I decided I wanted to be a stay at home mom; however, that isn't possible, so I work. Now, Wes works super hard and I am not slighting him in the least, but if I could be a full time student/SAHM I would be set. I would still graduate and search for a job, but I would love to be with Trenton.

This weekend did teach me one huge lesson (besides I want to be a SAHM) and that was to just let it go. This SAHM thing is great, but I can't worry about it, it isn't up to me. In talking to Wes yesterday I told him that being in Nashville and seeing how much joy was in the room and how happy every one was - I decided I would quit worrying. We are not destitute, we are not struggling, we are doing well. We have jobs, we have a healthy (for the most part) child - with the best attitude ever and I am the Mom to a great child and a wife to a wonderful husband.

My new outlook is to not worry - or at least try, but how hard is it to let go of everything? To truly trust God to know what is best. If it is in the cards for me, I will be a stay at home mom, but maybe not. I do not know what the future holds, but I know I am missing out on life by worrying all the time and trying to be in control, so hold me accountable. I will slip and I will fall, but I am going to do my best to stay on track and focus on my family and the things that matter most. Everything else will fall into place.

In the meantime, if you read my blog Judy Blume, I am still waiting for the sequel to your classic book. Maybe it is out there and I know nothing of it - help a girl out!